Meet Mary!!

my goofran <3

Lookbook post

Bah!! This picture is so old! But I still love it. Did it in high school and still can't stop looking. I remember this life. I remember the guy in these pictures. The confused... lost, and too controlled boy you see in these pictures is dead, I understand myself now, holistically.

Removing the cloaked facade

Sometimes going against the rules feels good. We all at times need a break from the cloaked facade that is inconveniently draped over our shoulders, to free ourselves from the expected and allow life to take on its own shape. Looking at dsquared from this upcoming fall brought me to a place of rebellion. Oversized black hats slightly covered secretly sinister faces made the characters on the runway look as if they were hiding something. The overall construction of the ensembles shown was moderately heavy and slightly complex. White layers were topped with black vests, corsets, jackets, and some coats. Even though the amount of layers on each of the looks provided for a mix of levels and lengths, a pair of crisp jeans characteristic of dsquared weighted each look making them realistic and practical. Looking at each piece that went into the series of looks shown, it is easy to see contemporary audiences taking to the slight risk one would have to take to incorporate this collection into their wardrobe. 

rubbing away the callused status quo that has defined me

At times I feel like I am the only person that feels the way I do. Being surrounded by a number of different stereotypes that are suppose to exemplify what I’m supposed to strive to be, gets a little frustrating. Loving the fine arts, including ballet and other forms at times separates me from the majority of the people around me. Lately I have decided to be 100% of myself, to allow my suppressed emotions to erode away all of my insecurities. Like the erupting Colorado River slowly beating away the red rock in the Grand Canyon, my true self is slowly rubbing away the callused status quo that has defined me. I found this new happiness in God. In this chapter in my life I have taken the opportunities He has given me by weeding out the personality I’ve grown into and I have pruned away the bull. I’ve been myself lately and honestly I have been the happiest and the angriest with myself and my past. Although I’m happy with these changes, an alteration with yourself sometimes hurts. Looking at Jean Paul Gaultier’s collection for this upcoming fall I saw a man that has seen the ends of the earth and has made his career doing everything he loves. He never disappoints himself, which is the most important thing for a designer. This collection started out with a flash of bond, which echoes to us classic menswear. Then within the next few looks we are taken to a place that is anything but classic or normal. Jean Paul’s collection went through a number of phases. It started out with classic menswear then after the shocking look that changed the course of the collection we didn’t go back to conventional menswear for the rest of the collection, and I wouldn’t have it any other way. Something that caught my eye is the asexual style that filled the collection. It was bursting with suggestive separates that helped define this collection’s androgynous overtone. The patterns worked well and so did the different levels and lengths that Gaultier played with. Overall, this show was awesome; even though I don’t necessarily see myself in a lot of the pieces shown I do appreciate Gaultier’s creative genius.   

Breaking the surface of this realm. Eye’s shut tightly. Lying limp whilst screaming.

Life is full of surprises, some pleasant and some not so pleasant. I was born to a loving father, and a loving and fully dedicated mother. As time progressed these parental descriptions began to merge as the understanding of how I thought increased. 

“What to stimulate his mind with? What to interest him with?” Unsure.God gives us all a hand to play in fates poker game. Some are given a royal flush while some are simply given a high card. Before one can truly play the hand they were given a simple understanding of the rules are crucial.

1. Cheat when you can go unnoticed or punished.

2. Figure out how that hand plays a part in not only your life, but the lives of others.

3. Allow your hand to remodel itself given a certain environment.

4. As your chameleon grows teach it to not only reflect its colors differently but also its size and shape    depending on its audience.

5. Finally, break, add, subtract, alter, re-word any rule when needed.

Unfortunately for me, I was given these rules. Not from my loving parents, but from this world. As I grew from nothing to immature those around me, that were undergoing the same changes, ostracized themselves from me. As I became used to this treatment I clung to the arts. Even though at times I felt as if I wanted to disappear, my newly discovered talents comforted me. I soon, upon reaching a state of complacency, could spend hours painting, whether it was with my fingers of with horse hair. Something about creating something beautiful with my hands gave me purpose and meaning. Art gave me the opportunity to create something that could be appreciated while I was persecuted and even beaten by my peers. “Something wonderful can actually come from me? But what about what THEY say?”

Life goes on